And don't ever kid yourself on this important point: He is still having sex with his wife, no matter what you may want to believe. Legally, financially and emotionally, you have no claim.
You may realize that you have no claim legally or financially, but you would think there'd be an emotional attachment or bond between you and your lover.
Their life together includes friendships and a social network that is shared and comfortable for him. Whether it is because of all the legal and financial problems attached to divorce, religious beliefs or the fact that they have become comfortable with their marriage the way it is -- or even because they still have a certain affection for their wives, men rarely end up with the other woman.
Even Katharine Hepburn knew, and accepted, this fact during her long affair with Spencer Tracy.
That's why we rounded them all up for you—because we thought there was a chance you might have some trouble really buying it.Perhaps the best advice you can give someone about having a relationship with a married man is telling her not to even start. As my friend Jenna* told me, "You can't help who you fall in love with.The love of your life just might be a married man." Being part of any couple can be challenging and unpredictable, as we all know.Being involved in an affair with someone else's husband is an almost surefire trip from ecstatic highs at the beginning to a depressing abyss at the end.Understand the basics of exactly what you are getting into, and what your status is.He knows that holding on to emotions that can only cause problems for his family is something he cannot and will not do. To safeguard yourself from too much emotional pain, you need to understand that he can only be a small part of your life and will never be more than that no matter how many promises are made.You need to have a life that works and that is full enough to withstand the pain of the eventual breakup. A solid circle of friends and a social life separate from your hidden life with him is a necessity.Her close circle of friends might know about her affair, but she really cannot let anyone else, such as colleagues or her family, know.She is alone most of the time and spends it waiting: waiting for her married lover to call, to come meet her, to share some precious time together.She is not his wife, she is not mother to his children, she is not his parents' daughter-in-law.Her chance for happiness hinges on a future that is highly uncertain, to say the least. Once you take marriage vows, you have what a sacred sanctity owed to your spouse.You've promised to be there for them through more than just sickness and health, but until death.However, with up to 50 percent of all marriages ending in divorce, that's not exactly the case anymore—and online dating platforms are well aware of this fact.